Did Jackie Mason write this script?

by: ken bank

Wed Apr 09, 2008 at 12:10:00 AM EDT

That's not all.  In desperation the big shots turn to The Miracle Worker, John Crowley, who single-handedly saved his own kids from an incurable disease.  They hope he can perform another trick and miraculously save the NJ GOP from another statewide embarrassment.  The Miracle Worker says he'll think about it, then after thinking about it says he won't do it.  Then The Miracle Worker gets a call from the War Hero (John McCain) begging him to reconsider, which he does.  Then The Bean Baron says he'll get out if The Miracle Worker gets in.  The Miracle Worker says he'll probably get in, but then at the last minute changes his mind again and says this time he's definitely not getting in.  Then The Bean Baron says he's definitely staying in even though he's on vacation and doesn't know when he'll be back.  Now there's a rumor that another GOP Big Brand Name (Tom Kean Jr.) is thinking about getting into the race if the Bean Baron decides to get out, which the Bean Baron has said he won't do but might do because he said before he won't do it but then said he might do it.

In the meantime, back at the Democratic Ranch, everyone waits for the gunfight at the New Jersey corral between Frank "the Alte Kocker" Lautenberg and Rob "Joe Lieberman Wannabee" Andrews.  It looks like the GOP will give us The Keystone Cops while the Democrats give us their version of the main event from Rocky VI.