All the smelly gossip

by: smells_like_the_onion

Wed Mar 23, 2011 at 04:39:44 PM EDT

Anyway, I would like to start by-a apologize to Senator Lesniak. When-a I tell him, "God no like-a folk like you," it was because I mis-hear-a what he say. I was-a think he say, "Hi! I'm a gay lesbian!" But, no - he just tell-a me his name. So, I'm-a ver' sorry, Senator. So long as you keep you naughty parts away from-a similar looking naughty parts, you-a will be okay. You can-a even kill people and God will-a still love you if you not gay. You can even-a have incest and God love you if-a you not gay. You can-a kill someone while-a havin incest and God still love-a you if you not-a gay. God only hate-a the gay people. But God still let them in to decorate because, well, God-a not stupid. Who you-a think pick out the lovely drapes? Not-a Jesus, I tell-a you so much!

Next-a item: I hear that Steve-a Sweeney, the Pope a da State Senate, or whatever you call-a him, is-a trying to appeal to moderate voters by moving to the right of-a the Governor. Already Popa Sweeney has-a said that he want-a to cut labor rights, which-a the Church supports. This is-a because it is much-a easier to hoodwink a few rich Catholics into giving tons of-a money than it is to deal with-a all the dirty working folk. Next up, Sweeney is-a gonna introduce "chattel" status for-a women. But only if they-a choose it. He's-a big on choice. So long-a as everyone make-a the right choice that he agree with.

And-a finally - Cory-a Booker really piss off-a the Pope. I'm-a not sure how. I think-a it's about the Twitter thing. I'm-a not so sure what a "Twitter" is. I think it-a somethin with a bird or what. So, if-a any of you know Mister-a Booker, tell-a him to be nice-a to the little birdies. Because God love-a all His creatures. Except-a the gay ones.