Bumped! – Rosi
Hamilton: The Musical has been a huge success, so why not another Broadway show: Trump: the Musical. There are plenty of existing songs that could serve as a starting point for the libretto. After two minor word substitutions the show could open with:
“America was having trouble, what a sad, sad story.
Needed a new leader to restore its former glory.
Where, Oh where was he? Where could that man be?
We looked around and then we found the man for you and me.
And now it’s Springtime for Trump and America.” (Mel Brooks)
“Put your money on me; all your money on me,” as Trump ignores the emolument clause and welcomes laundered money. (Arcade Fire)
“I’m a dangerous man with money in my pocket,” as he boasts about how he treats government funds like his personal piggy bank. (Bruno Mars)
“Immigrants and faggots they make no sense to me.
They come to our country and think they’ll do as they please.” Obviously no wiser words have been spoken. (Guns N’ Roses)
“Don’t say a word, my virgin child, just let your inhibitions run wild.” He’s our macho man. (Rod Stewart)
His admirers could sing:
“You walked into the party like you were walking onto a yacht.” (Carly Simon)
“Welcome to a new kind of tension.
All across the alienation.
Where everything isn’t meant to be okay.” (Green Day)
Every show has to have a foil who protests against the hero:
“For the love of money people will lie, Lord, they will cheat
For the love of money people don’t care who they hurt or beat.” (The O’Jays?)
“Messenger of fear in sight.
Dark deception kills the light.” (Metallica)
“He’s a real nowhere man sitting in his nowhere land.
Doesn’t have a point of view; knows not where he’s going to.
Nowhere Man, the world is at your command.
He’s as blind as he can be. Just sees what he wants to see.” (Beatles)
“One always picks the easy fights. One praises fools.
One smothers light. One shifts left to right.” (Andrew Lloyd Webber and Tim Rice)
Of course Trump is the heroic star of this epic musical, so he will come back insisting that we trust him, and the show will end with the melodic, soaring, German Nazi song used in Cabaret, which Trump must like.
“I am that I am; I have all power.
I will deliver If you will only trust me.
Trust me. Trust me.” (Richard Smallwood)
Curtain falls amidst wild applause with the the actor playing Trump taking many bows to his adoring audience.
P.S. The producer of this magnum opus should make haste to launch it. As a famous thespian said, “All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players. They have their exits and their entrances.” Our hero’s exit might be sooner than he expects.