It’s a Small Thing, But …

When I got married a lot of people asked if my wife was going to take my name.  I always replied, “I’m sure as hell not changing mine, so why should she change hers?”

In truth, I would have been happy if she had taken my name and am happy that she didn’t.  

But if I wanted to I should have been allowed, and apparently in New Jersey the only way would be through a court order.  Because I have a Y chromosome.  

There are only nine states that currently allow a man to change his name after marriage in the same manner as a woman: California, New York, Hawaii, Louisiana, Massachusetts, Oregon, Iowa, Georgia and North Dakota. Other states require additional paperwork, months to process the request and a hefty filing fee.

This is not only wrong that a guy can’t change his name on marriage, but what about the assumption that a woman would.  I know it’s sexist, but how often do you get sexist stuff that’s wrong to both sides like this, but in completely different ways?

It’s not marriage equality, but it is about equality in marriage.

And, speaking of that, when we do get marriage equality maybe two women can swap names without any problem but two men getting married will be stuck with theirs?

The whole thing is just stupid, belittling to everyone.  

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